Still Shaking it Off - Sunday

In the still pouring rain, Steve, Simon and DJ and I went to the tent site around 7:30 and raised the tent and unloaded the product. I shooed them out so I could finish setting up. It was decently breezy with regularly strong gusts of wind. I also learned that other vendors were having problems too which made me feel better in a sick way. I guess I really thought it was just me and I was too stupid to be allowed to do outdoor shows.

I have to say that while my tent was a big fat mess, the stuff inside my tent never budged. The sandbags that Mom and I made - Mom sewed cute covers for them - for the Sticky Notes stand and my 2 card spinners worked perfectly. The lesson learned at the Lilac Festival was nicely executed! (Thanks again, Mom!)

It rained throughout the morning. I had my tables pulled in from the sides so the wet tent sides wouldn't touch them. I had my Sticky Notes stand pulled into the middle of the tent. Overall, I had a compact version of my usual set-up. I was unable to relax and stitch though because the gusts kept picking up and I'd reach up and hold the roof of the tent. (We'd only raised the tent to people height, not it's full height, trying to keep a lower profile that the wind couldn't easily catch.) The tent wasn't going anywhere with both the top and bottom weighted so well. The holding of the tent was strictly psychological for me.

My clothes were pretty wet from setting up in the rain so I was a little chilly, when just the day before I'd been hot all day. (Another lesson learned successfully from a previous experience - my sunscreen prevented sunburn!)

I was so worried about my product getting wet that I finally ended up putting a sheet of plastic (thanks Dad) over my Sticky Notes stand. I noticed later that my cards had gotten a few drops on them but they are protected in cellophane sleeves so no damage done. I couldn't imagine how rain got inside to the back of the tent where the cards were but I think the water must have flown off the tent walls, being whipped by the wind.

Not one person had come in my tent all morning anyway. Oh yeah, there were people walking around with umbrellas, but I never saw them stop anywhere. I saw a few umbrellas blown inside out. Honestly, I don't get it. If it was me, I probably wouldn't leave the house on such a miserable day. I saw two women pushing a woman in a wheelchair who was so covered by plastic, I wasn't sure if there was a person in there or not. Truthfully - it kind of looked like elder abuse to me. She could not have been having fun. Karen wondered if could she have even spoken up if she wanted to. Pushing kids around in strollers in the rain (some shielded with plastic, some not) was pretty unbelievable to me, but the wheelchair thing was shocking, I have to say.

Around noon Karen and another vendor on the other side of me were talking about packing up and leaving. It was that bad. A vendor across the street from us left Saturday night and didn't come back. The smoked almonds person's stuff was gone. The lemonade stand across the street never opened and he was talking about leaving in an hour. One vendor checked the hour-by-hour forecast and said the 24 mph winds would last until 4:00, then it would die down. The rain would stop before that, but not the wind.

The other veterans decided to leave, so I did too. I called Steve but he wasn't sure how much help he and the boys could be since they couldn't drive up close to where I was with the streets being closed. I know he really thought I should stick it out. If I was him, I'd think the same thing. I knew I wasn't thinking clearly - I just wanted out. So I relied on these two vendors - one had done this show for 6 years, the other for 12. Karen was on the end of our row and really taking the brunt of the wind. The other one, whose name I've drawn a blank on - I saw some of her boxed beautiful blown glass jewelry blow out into the street. My tent was broken and I have paper product. It seemed crazy to stay.

The thing is, I have very strong feelings about vendors who leave early. It's against the written rules for every show but I wouldn't do it anyway. I've sat at very slow shows until the bitter end, seething at those "amateurs" who I see leaving early.

My car was parked in a lot across main street so I boxed up my product and carried it to my car. This next part sounds like I made it up for sort of comic relief.

On my second trip to the car, I stepped on a crooked gas main surrounded by a pot hole (couldn't see it because of the boxes) - and fell to the ground. In the middle of Main Street. Carrying a box of glass plates. The plastic box broke as did almost all the plates inside.

It was just as awful as it sounds.

I'd just seen 3 burly guys walk out of the coffee shop before I fell. I recognized them from the day before - I think they ran various food carts. They were very gregarious, which is why I remember them. Real "showfolk", like carnival barkers almost. After I fell, they were by my side as soon as I hit the ground.

"Don't move. Take stock of yourself. Are you okay? Are you hurt?" 

All I wanted to do was jump up and pretend it didn't happen. Ta-da! Fall? What fall?? Or as Gretchen said later, "And she stuck the landing!"

I was shaken up and couldn't find my glasses. I was worried they were broken, not because I cared about seeing :-) but because I didn't want the expense of having them fixed/replaced! So I became that person, "Where are my glasses? I can't find my glasses!" They found them for me and helped me up. Karen came running up and took my boxes to the car. My lip was bleeding a tiny bit and my knee had a tiny scrape but I was fine. A woman appeared from I don't know where - a vendor I guess, offering me a blanket. I really was fine, though totally embarrassed but she insisted I take the blanket because I was wet and cold. So I did so as to not hurt her feelings but later I was happy I had as I sat in my car cold and wet.

Crap. I hate when that happens. The falling part. The kindness of strangers totally floored me this weekend. I'm a big pay-it-forward person - sure hope I have the opportunity to properly repay all the kindness I felt this weekend.

Afterwards, one of the guys asked me again if I was okay. I smiled and said, "Definitely!" He said, "Good. Then in that case, man, that was a beautiful dive you took! You shoulda seen it!" And he did a little fake swan dive. He was funny and made me laugh.

I finished carrying my boxes to the car - watching where I stepped! I secured the tent and went to the car to get warm and collect myself. I couldn't leave for 5 hours because the roads were closed. I tried to stitch but couldn't concentrate because the guilt of leaving was killing me! I kept watching the weather. People were still walking around with umbrellas but maybe the wind wasn't as bad as I thought it was. But getting out of the car into the weather I realized it was still fairly strong. And two roof beams of my tent were broken. I wasn't just being a big baby because of the rain. And my product is paper. I know, I'm repeating myself. Sorry.

About 1:30 Gretchen texted me, "Where are you?" I texted her back, "In my car. Are you at Canal Days?" She was on her way she texted back so I called her and ended up crying in no time. (See what I mean about it being a big ol' tear soaked weekend??) She said, "I'm on my way!" She brought me a nice warm White Chocolate from Starbucks. She sat in the car with me for about an hour talking. She said all the right things, we laughed and traded stories. I had no idea she was planning on coming to Canal Days - I don't think she was, until she'd read an email about how miserable my Saturday was. She showed up at exactly the right time and said the right things. I love that.

This is why I say It Takes a Village to support Team Stefani. Steve is the mayor of my village - very supportive but all smart and problem solving. Dad and Simon are that way too, doing their male thing, "How can we fix this?" Mom's the champion hugger and stitcher. Gretchen is the peer with the same foibles and strengths - the same mind set. I need 'em all.

I tell you, I knew I'd feel like crap for leaving early but I had no idea how deeply. Overall, I regret my decision to leave but I made the best decision I could with the information available at the time. By the time 5:00 rolled around, the wind had calmed some, the rain had stopped and the crowd had filled in, though attendance was obviously still way down. I walked over to one of the parking lots with Gretchen so she could get her annual Artichoke French and I counted about 6 empty vendor spots - people that left after Saturday presumably. Gretchen later reported that about 1/3 of the vendors had left the other parking lot area.

Steve had made me promise I wouldn't make a decision about future shows until a few days had passed and the dust had settled. I'm committed to two more outdoors shows, but even before Sunday was over I knew I would continue to do outdoor shows. I want to succeed at this business and doing big festivals is where the money is. I'll feel "less-than" if I don't.

This weekend was only my 4th outdoor show - that's pretty early in the learning curve. I always say I live & breathe my business and one of the most satisfying things has been learning new stuff. I just underestimated how painful this new learning curve was going to be - it's kind of been a shock to my system. It's weird because I thought I was more of a roll-with-the-punches kind of girl.

One of the things Gretchen said to me when talking me off the ledge yesterday was that there's a difference between quitting and giving up. Giving up is not even trying, not caring. Quitting is to stop doing something that isn't working. 

I've got 6 weeks before the next show - plenty of time to buy a new upgraded tent. If I'm going to learn these stupid weather lessons, I guess better to learn them with a relatively inexpensive "starter" tent. Though I suppose one could make the argument that maybe a better tent would not have snapped like that. Hard to say.

Before I bought this tent last year, I talked to many vendors about their tents and their experiences. I did research online. Ultimately, I decided to stop overthinking it and buy the basic EZ-Up like most festival vendors do. I honestly don't regret my decision at all. Now I know what to look for and what questions to ask.

Dad always says, "Good or bad, it won't last." I always say to Simon, "This (blank) is finite - it has an end. It won't always be like this." Mom always says, "Rise above it."

None of those things were helpful to me in the midst of this money-losing weekend. I was super miserable all weekend and I was worried the memory of this show would haunt me forever. But already today, Monday, I feel way better than I thought I would. I know the bad memories will recede and the lessons will stick. 

My sales were decent on Saturday, but I lost Sunday sales plus the cost of a new tent, new display glassware and I paid Simon and DJ handsomely because I literally could not have gotten through this weekend without their help. Plus the show fee, of course.

(My insurance deductible is higher than the cost of a new tent - I checked.)

And I did not have one ounce of fun. But I will next time - and I've shaken off the feeling of wanting to never do another outdoor show and gotten to where I'm excited and eager to become the seasoned pro that I am with indoor shows. Take that, you.

The festival ended at 5:00. And then the sun came out.